Dr. Mietz's First Three Rules

People keep asking for my life rules.  Here's the abbreviated version... everyone should have a code by which they live.  I can't say I have it down to an extensive list but the first three have never failed me:

Rule No. 1: Don't be dumb.  If something seems questionable, don't do it.  If you aren't sure it's a smart decision, it's probably dumb.  Don't do it. You can be gutsy, brave, daring, just don't be dumb.

Rule No. 2: If you didn't write it down, it didn't happen. I keep a log for most of the important things I do in life.  It sounds a little tedious but my memory sucks.  I attribute this partially to my dyslexia but if I write it down, I seldom have trouble remembering or proving a memory. I keep a running/training log, practice journal, written budget for our personal finances, and even a personal journal.  My iCal is immaculate. If it's worth remembering, it's worth writing down.

Rule No. 3: Consistency is key. This one ties the other two together, I think.  Work applied over time yields big results.  Example A: diamonds.  Pressure (i.e. work) over time creates something precious.  Writing things down helps me track and even improve my consistency.  If something is important to you, work at it as often as you can. When using consistency as a rule daily is good, twice daily is better, when I'm really in the thick of things, three times a day is the norm.  How much work are you completing a week/month/year?  When you have these numbers, you can evaluate the benefit of upping that number in the next period.  If it's worth doing, be consistent about it.

There are the first three.  I'm sure there are more but I use these every day.  Hope they help... I'd love to hear about your experiences with them!

Integrity

A cursory glance at an online definition will give you the following definitions of the word "integrity:" Thanks

in·teg·ri·ty

noun

1. 1.

   the quality of being honest and having strong moral principles; moral uprightness.

   "he is known to be a man of integrity"

   synonyms:

   honesty, probity, rectitude, honor, good character, principle(s), ethics,morals, righteousness, morality, virtue, decency, fairness,scrupulousness, sincerity, truthfulness, trustworthiness More
2. 2.

   the state of being whole and undivided.

   "upholding territorial integrity and national sovereignty"

   synonyms:

   unity, unification, coherence, cohesion, togetherness, solidarity

 Thanks Google dictionary.  This is a word I find myself clinging too almost daily but how do we apply it? A better question is, should we?

The answer is a resounding YES!  No one asks about integrity without implying it should be observed. Here's what integrity means to me.  Definition 1: I don't knowingly lie, I don't cheat, I don't steal, or deceive anyone or anything.  If a commitment is made, I stick to it unless new information presents itself and then I'm upfront about why I reconsidered.  Even then, I'll still do my best to uphold my commitment.  Definition 2: as Abraham Lincoln said "a house divided cannot stand."  This goes for the individual as well.  My convictions may not make sense to others but they are unified in my consciousness.  I strive to be upright and solid in my little world.  No loose ends, no unpaid bills, no surprise phone calls.

I've taken a number of oaths in my time but none weigh more deeply on my consciousness than my wedding vows and my Masonic obligations.  To me being a husband and a Mason are a serious business and not something to be taken lightly.  Each requires a promise to God and to others that we will do the right thing.  Weddings use rings as symbols of unending love and devotion, Masons use tools as symbols.  I promised my wife to love and take care of her for the rest of her life.  Much of Masonry is sworn to secrecy but it is no secret that some of the symbols are a square, compass, and plumb line.  I'm sure every Mason has his own interpretation of them and how they fit in his life.  For me, the square reminds me to be square with people.  I do my best to be honest and fair.  I pay the bill for dinner and give a fair tip; no more, no less.  A square is always 90 degrees and when used in trigonometry, gives you answers you may have a difficult time finding otherwise.  Think back to high school and those silly questions about the height of a tree and its shadow.  I bet you didn't know trig was actually teaching you morality!  The compass measures proportions, makes perfect circles, and (in my backcountry experiences) reminds me where north is.  Drive into any town in the United States and you'll see the compass around the letter G.  For me, not all Masons, the compass shows the way to God, my true north.  Any carpenter can tell you that a plumb line is nothing more than a vertical line.  Gravity pulls the weight and the string goes taught and shows the directionality of the force of gravity on the earth. Stand up straight.  Do an honest day's work.

When you combine all these qualities, you are left with a pretty amazing man.  I can't promise I'm 100% on all of them all the time but I do my best.  This is how integrity applies to everything.  Strive for perfection but accept that in this human form, we are going to come up short some, if not most of the time.  Some of these shortcomings we can avoid just by being our "best, most authentic selves," to quote Rich Roll.  If you've read my blog before, you know that running and music are important to me.  When I'm running and really present, I know that God is there helping me.  When working on a difficult piece of music I have no idea how I'll ever get through it but God does.  When my wife sings (a beautiful operatic singer), I feel something deeper than just the notes and rhythms.  I hear God's message through her voice (whatever the context or language of the lyrics) I hope people see that in my music and running as well.  There is no "life hack" to this wonderful state.  No shortcut.  You simply cannot scream-sing and hear that message like you can with decades of refined practice.  You can't just turn up the drums, plug in a distortion pedal, and drown out the congregation and expect to unify a group.  This is something Stravinsky wrestled with at the premiere of the Rite of Spring.  He sought to portray the profane; the non-refined pagan cultures.  This work is terrific but no one would ever consider it a sacred work (except Esa Pekka-Salonen who called it a Bible because it is terrifying for the musicians and dancers).  With Rite of Spring you see an artistic portrayal of a primitive society.  With Bach's B Minor Mass or St. Matthew's Passion, you feel God's integrity.  Martin Luther wrote "A mighty fortress is our God." To me, this implies craftsmanship, hard work, dedication, and most of all integrity.  Luther did not write, "our God is an unrefined, shoddily constructed, concert venue."  When my wife sings, it is solid, beautiful, and touches everyone (admit it or not) deeply.  It's not about musical style, it's about the integrity.  Solid, square, upright before God.  Even if you try and miss, there's power in the attempt.  No amount of praise-gasm, history lessons, scream-sinigng, or "just want to this or just want to that" can engage the soul as authentically as the refined traditions of thousands of years of worship.  There is no shortcut to being a good musician, runner, and who am I to argue with two thousand years of tradition. That's not to say that we can't have modern music but it should maintain the same ethos.  The Maslanka Mass, Bernstein Mass, Lloyd-Weber Mass, Britten War Requiem all move the listener just as much as the Bach mentioned earlier.  Thankfully, no scream-singing.  

One final thought to leave you with:  C.S. Lewis in Mere Christianity talks about three kinds of morality.  There is your morality (or standing) with God, other living creatures, and yourself.  If you construct your personal building on a solid foundation from the ground up, you will have integrity with each of those branches of morality.  For me this is the only way to live.